30.12.11

So sick.

I don't mean to be judgemental.
I don't mean to generalize.
I do mean to vent, but somehow whenever I need to talk something through, someone seems to think I am in the wrong. "You're just so self-righteous and you think you're all that" - I heard those exact words tonight as I tried to describe how I was feeling to someone. Did it ever occur to that someone that maybe I wasn't self-righteous or vain, but rather I was emotionally twisted up? Nobody's perfect and I am most definitely no exception, but maybe just this once I can try and explain how I feel without someone telling me that it's my fault.

Boys. That one word makes me absolutely cringe at the moment. I hate drama and I especially dislike people who flirt. I apologize, it nearly drives me out of my mind. I don't flirt, not unless I like the boy a lot, and when I do flirt it is only with that boy because I feel no need to lead anyone else on. No one else seems to understand this. The boy steals the girls backpack, he runs off with it just so that she will chase him, she tackles him, blah blah blah. I've honestly seen this scenerio more than once in one day and it generally happens over twenty times with the same boy/girl. I guess one just isn't satisfying enough...

What bothers me even more is that people are okay with this. They like the flirting, so they let it happen even though it means nothing just because it makes them feel important. They get the approval they were seeking for from the opposite gender and are content. Which brings me to "friends with benefits". I'm not even going to talk about that right now... nothing bugs me more.

I hate to point fingers. I really do. But I am completely fed up with people right now. It seems all classiness has gone down the drain and it makes me sick.

Which is why I am here, at 12:30am, blogging about it. Because no one else seems to understand. No one else will listen to me for five seconds. I am not being a jerk. I am simply stating what I see every day and confessing my opinion of it. I love people; I hate that they are so messed up.

So please, no more drama.
Please, no more jealousy.
Please, no more "friends with benefits".
Please, no more flirting with someone unless you actually like them.
Please, no more leading on.
And please, no more feeling absolutely ignored.

Because the fact of the matter is, I feel entirely ignored by boys in general. The fact of the matter is, I feel disliked by the human race, like I annoy everyone, unloved by the people who are supposed to love me the most and hurt.

It's an insecure day, a bad day, a day where you ultimately want to disappear in a dark corner somewhere alone and cry until you can't breathe.

With nowhere to sleep, nothing to do and no one to talk to I'm just praying I'll make it through the night.

Please tell me I'm not the only one who feels this way.

Sincerely,
Shelby Nicole

two thousand and twelve: goal(s)

that's my goal. what's yours?

smile love,
 austyn

28.12.11

Great news!

Absolutely Bonkers officially has a facebook "like" page!

Be sure to log on and "like" our page!

Thanks!

Love,
the girls.

27.12.11

Smile. Big.

That's all I have to say, darling.

Loves,
Emma

25.12.11

Guys, the nutshell just got bigger: by Emma

I am kind of really bad at telling things about myself without getting stuck on extremely long tangents... so I decided that the best way you could really get to know me is through a collection of things I love: words and pictures. Sometimes when I see an especially lovely picture or word my heart stops. And I absolutely adore it. And I have to share that picture with others, usually through my blog. So here is me:



My name is Emma and....



I adore the color orange. polka dots. rings. owls.




Chocolate. smiles. pearls. rainy days.



Taking pictures. socks. grey. cute boys.




I am stoked about life. basketball season. school. summer.






I am really really nerdy. just don't let anyone know.





Music. curly hair. laughing. justin bieber. :]




That's me. skinny jeans. green apples. sweaters. TOMS.





Maybe.


Come on. lets do it. together.


And let's dream together.


Kooky, quirky, crazy teenage girls unite!


Loves,

Emma Caroline

New Project!

So, I've decided to design and create an evening gown collection inspired by some of the gowns of the 20's-50's, designers such as Ellie Saab, Vera Wang and just the word vintage in general. I've mostly finished the first one pictured, and just started piecing the second one together. I haven't gotten all my materials though for the first one so it'll be a long project...Haha, so I'm hoping to have 4 gowns when it's done. I'm hoping they will be cohesive through the similar textiles, colors and same fabrics. So, here's a sketch of the first two as well as a few pictures for a little sneak peak, Enjoy! :)

Carmen Nicole





24.12.11

Carli - with an "I"

Nobody has ever spelled my name right their first try. They always spell it "Carly" or "Carlie" so remember, carli with an " i '' !
The word I would use to describe myself is "
chill". I am not a dramatic person & I love to laugh!
Lets get this over with: I
hate Pumpkin Pie. No, I'm not crazy!!! I can't stand pumpkin pie. I mean, who wants to eat some nasty stringy squash with cinnamon and sugar in it. Gross! That's like me making you some mashed potatoes and sticking them in some pie crust and pouring cinnamon and sugar on top. Would YOU eat that? Blah...
I love music and playing the piano. Some of my favorite songs to play on the piano are from
the movie "Pride a Prejudice" with Kiera Knightly. I mostly listen to random rock bands, But I'm not too picky with my music.
Currently, I am learning to speak spanish. I can speak pretty well, but I wish I were fluent!
I love indian food. Actually I like most food except fish (ew). I run my own business that sells girl's accessories - www.mycutedeals.com
My favorite colors are
Orange and Turquoise. I love re-fashioning clothing, like buying ugly fat pants and turning them in to adorable skinny pants! I love snowflakes and snow. Speaking of snow... Tomorrow is Christmas!

~

But I held on

...for too long
and it killed me.






It was march. March fifteenth, I'm sure. Of 1997. Not even a year old, you and I were best friends. And best friends it stayed. until last year. It was then I decided your obliviousness to it all and my pain wasn't worth it. I couldn't let myself feel that way. so I left. I left you. A friend I'd had for fourteen years. In three seconds... It was gone.

The worst part? Worse than losing you?
I saw it coming.
In fourth grade, maybe? When I walked around at recess by myself?
No, maybe fifth grade. When I felt like a third wheel. A square third wheel.
But in sixth grade... We were best friends. There was four of us, best friends. 
But then... You talked about me. Behind my back. It hurt. But who was I supposed to believe? My best friend or her, the one who told me? We talked about it, but I believed you. I trusted you. But I guess that's okay... Because last year... I stood up for myself. I finally did what I had never dared to do. i left. simple as that. I stood up and left. I sat with some new friends. Friends in which I felt included. I didn't feel awkward with my hole filled kicks and loose fitting tops. I felt at home
But see, I guess it worked out for the best. For both of us. I have new friends. And you can go on 'living life'... Or whatever you call it, without me 'controlling it'. Don't think I don't care, cause I do. I care about you. I don't care about the fake you. the one I see in the halls at school. I care about the you that only I see. I saw it. When you sat by me on the bus. Or when you are alone in the halls. It's there. I see it. It was that part of you that kept me holding on. Hoping. That one day you would remember her too, and come back. But you won't. I realized that after your insincere 'hey' and blocking me on facebook... As if I don't already know. It was then... Today actually... I defriended you. Such a simple task but to me meant sooo much and you won't notice. But I will. I'll see it in the halls.



See... I had a best friend, then I lost her. But now, I have a best friend. Actually, I have multiple. Friendship is a strange thing, it is. You lose one friend and gain sooo many friends. Sure for the first few weeks after leaving her, I felt stupid. I aimlessly walked the halls. But today, I walk with a purpose. I'm not self conscience, I'm comfortable walking alone because I know I'm never really alone.


And neither are you.




smile gorgeous,
austyn

23.12.11

the name is shelby.

hey! i'm here to describe what i am like, and i honestly don't know who that is! crazy? i don't think so.
m u s i c. <--- that right there is LIFE. have a bad day? i promise there's a song to make you feel better it may be about cheeseburgers and fries (hey some american's are obsessed) but it can make you laugh :)
i'm not one of those, feel sorry for yourself kind of people. if life knocks you down or teases you a little bit i believe you should get back on your feet and PUNCH LIFE IN THE FACE. :)
i grew up with my 3 siblings ages (30, 27, and 24) two of them are boys; i'm aggressive if i want to be! hahaha. my parents have been divorced since the age of two. i ALWAYS thought it was because i broke my dads brand spankin' new VCR player, until probably 2 years ago my mom laughed and told me that was certainly not the reason!

i love to follow my dreams and watch my self achieve them.
i'm a happy girl and i can get along with anybody. <3
i'm confused for an older age WAY too much! (i've been asked to homecoming...i'm 13.)
i'm OBSESSED with eminem, if you don't approve i'm sorry but get the clean version; i've had a lot of things happen to me that he talks about in his songs and it's my escape from the world. <3
my sister is my best friend.
umm what else?

i laugh constantly.
i am usually always smiling.
i love always.
i forgive easily.

i'm 100% addicted to Rockstars. :) 
i am off the wall.
i love to have fun. always.
i judge a lot.. sorry?
i talk WAY too much.
i love cereal.
i love love. <3 <3
i love good cuddling sesh's.
i love boys, a lot. 
i am 100% fluent in sarcasm.
i love funny people.
i am very easily entertained.
i love to dance.
i have amazing friends, and i would love if you were one of them. :)
i laugh a ton it's almost ridiculous.
i love you.
i love my dog. 
i love my family. 
i love making faces at people.
i love facebook.
i LOVE boys that smell good.
i love summa time when the livin's easy.
i love summer nights.
i love hottubbing.
i add the word face onto everything. 
i love old fashion.
i love hair. 
i love pinky promises.
i love good hair products.
i love to quote movies.
i love youtube.
i love netflix.
i love quotes probably WAY too much.

+ SO much more.

i hate being sick.
i hate being cold. 
i hate pinky promise breakers.
i hate when you thing back on all the time you spent with someone and your realize how much of your life you wasted. 
i hate hurting people; i'm sorry if i ever have or ever do.

hahahaha.

get it. got it? good. 
  


maaaannnn that was a lot. 

love you all. :) 

Groovy :D

Okay so I'm Carmy, 5 '7 1/2, blue eyes, light brown hair, white WHITE complexion...YEAH, that's it? Beauty is what everything is about. Like....the really deep stuff...Haha. Although usually I'm really outgoing and touchy and optimistic, sometimes I don't have even a remote interest in talking to anyone because I'm busy reading some intellectual, philosophical book by Aristotle or something..Yeah, it's weird. I love schooling peoples logic but I'm not too good at it yet. I really wish I was fluent with a Bajan accent, Spanish, Russian and everything else. I have a pretty Foreign spirit because other cultures appeal to me more than...boys? Yeah. The places I'm going first are, The Carribean, Scandinavia, Russia, Eastern Europe. I have a bad habit of cracking EVERYTHING in my body. Music. It's all great. ALL OF IT! No, 'Cept that mainstream cr-stuff, but yeah. I kinda like everything from old school rap, classical, indie rock, country, reggae and then R&B!! Yes, EVERYTHING in between (including subgenres:) Uuuhhh... I love doing crazy adventurous things and I love anything that's stressful, thrilling and riskful. I'm not scared of many things....Mostly just the dentist. No, seriously, that man is AFTER ME!! Anytime I'm at the dentist, I feel an indescribable excruciating pain and I psych myself out so bad to thinking I just had really intense oral surgery...It's bad. Yeah, so that's all. SMILE!!!!:):):):)

enough of me, let the posting begin.

so, hi. if you haven't read my introduction here, or if you have anyway, guess what, darlings, here's a little bit more about your fav. blog author. {oh, jk}. i'll make it brief:

name: Kathryn. 
age: 19.
color: white. but i swoon over anything pink.  
if i could be a smell: Chanel no. 5. 
if i could be anything: prima ballerina.
if i could be a season: winter.
if i could be a food: peppermint.
if i could be a day: Tuesday.
self-indulgence: tumblr.com.
best attribute: loving. 
worst attribute: i annoy easy in the mornings.
greatest fear: friends and family suffering.
greatest wish: peace on earth. 

lots of love. 
 image via tumblr.

Kathryn.

hey:)

Okay so my name is Savannah,

there's not much else to say about me except that I have a lot of determination and will power..when i set my mind to things.

I love music, not any specific genera, I like everything that has feeling to it. I love people and all of my blog post have a lot of meaning. Usually when I post about something, it is something I have either been struggling with, something I have discovered, or just something i've been thinking about.

I feel like life is so beautiful, even though its the hardest thing I've ever done :)

When I'm sad I dance the pain away in my room with the music blasting..it helps me to remember what I want for my life.

When I'm happy I love everyone!! I can't help but think that there has to be good in everyone. I put a lot into my relationships and when they end, it feels like the world has ended but in the most bittersweet way.

I hope this blog can be somewhere for girls to come and feel like someone understands how they feel and that everyone can feel at home here!!!

welcome and enjoy!!

~Savannah

This is me, welcome.

My name is Shelby, but you can call me Shelbs, since that seems to be the name everyone else picks up on. There are two "Shelby's" on this blog, so to avoid any possible confusion, I'm the blondie and my middle name is Nicole, which I will sign all my posts with so that no one is unsure at any time which Shelby is speaking.

Further introduction? Hmm, where to begin! Let's start by saying, I'm far too complicated for my own good. I also tend to be a tad melodramatic at times, so if you feel as if I've gone a bit too far, I apologize, I'm an actress and a writer - it's in the blood. I'm obsessed with music. I love anything from 80's rock to nowadays hip hop and pop or country. I'm also a big fan of the 1950's big band music. Jazz all the way. If it makes me wanna dance and sing along, you can guarantee I'll be listening to it or saving it to my playlist. I could care less what people think of me unless I love someone, then I care far too much about what they think of me. I tend to wear my heart on my sleeve. I'm naturally shy but I've been gifted with a brave heart and I can be outgoing if I want to be. I have a strange sense of humor that you can only really appreciate if you've known me long enough. I feel happiest when I am surrounded by the people I love. I feel depressed when I feel like there is no purpose to my life. There's nothing I hate more than being bored. I talk far too much. I'm all about "self-love" and being beautiful just because you're you. If you don't accept a compliment I give you, I am likely never to give you a compliment again. If you rag on yourself, I will go off on an hour long rampage about "how you're beautiful because you're you and nothing can change that", so it's better just to stay quiet about stuff like that around me. One thing is never enough to satisfy me. I sing, act, dance, blog, write novels, compete in beauty pageants and public speak. There's nothing I love more than being in front of a crowd; I thrive onstage, or when I am under the spotlight. I am entirely obsessed with Italy, it is my dream vacation spot. I have a thing for tall, skinny boys with big eyes and a sense of style - oh and an attractive European accent doesn't hurt either. I'm that girl that awkwardly dances around the school when musics playing, laughs louder than the average person screams and smiles way too much. I've been branded as the "advice giver" in my friend group, due to the fact that my mom is a psychology wiz and I just happen to know more about human behavior than is normal. I'm fairly enthusiastic about life and out pour energy until I completely exhaust myself. I love my feet. It's a full house where I live, 6 kids, two adults (three of which are my step-siblings) so that makes my need to be unique and original all the more potent in my every day life. I love life, love, people and more than anything I love being myself.

Questions I often get asked:
Do you dye your hair? No.
Are your eyelashes fake? No.
Are you eighteen? No.

The phrase you most often here me saying - "I need a boyfriend."

That's me. Now, what about you?

Loves,
Shelby Nicole

22.12.11

Hi, I'm austyn. What's your name?

I feel I should introduce myself before putting up my crazy ideas.


Hi I'm austyn. I will be sixteen a month from tomorrow. I am scared and super excited. Driving! Dating...? Anyways... Here are a few random things about me that may(or may not) explain the things I do.


First of all, I do not capitalize when I type unless speaking of the Lord. If anything is capitalized it's because of autocorrect. Other than that and my excessive use of periods, I'm usually pretty grammatically correct.
I am a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I believe it to be true, 100%.
I am quite fond of quotes... I love them and use them far too often. Oh and I quote charlie and the chocolate factory almost daily.
Until you get to know me, I'm super quiet, but my thoughts are always super loud. Once you get to know me, I don't shut up.
I live for music. Anytime I'm in my room my radio or iPod is on and full blast. It's a bad habit, I know.
Better to learn this now than later... I am sarcastic. Sar.cas.tic. Don't take everything(or most things) I say seriously. But. I'm not sarcastic when talking about serious things, like dance parties. (They thought I was kidding... I wasn't)
I've got quite a large family. I'm the second youngest of five and I have three nieces and a brother on a mission.
I act like I'm five and not-so-secretly wish I was five. I draw with chalk and color in coloring books. At lunch you will find me playing hide and seek tag.
I enjoy running, soccer, singing, and acting.
Oh and my socks don't usually match.


And there you have it...
I'm austyn, what's your name?


Oh and because I have already blog stalked you my blog is private, but I love new readers. If you would like an invite, email me at austynnh{at}comcast{dot}net and I'll get you an invite. :)

21.12.11

Weeeeellllllcooommmmeeee.

Hey girls!!! Welcome to "absolutely bonkers"! I'm WAY excited to be here! This idea kind of happened as a whim but has turned out to be an exciting journey that me and the rest of the girls are thrilled to begin! I apologize it's currently under construction, but that should be fixed soon. I'm SO excited to have you here!

By the time this blog is entirely finished and looking real good there should be about five writers, all of whom are teenage girls. We will share stories, talk about every kind of thing that occupies a teenage girls mind (boys, boys, boys, BOYS), and dare to be the amazing girls we were always meant to be! Feel free to stop by any time! You are most welcome. This blog centers around Dreams which is the main idea of this blog. We will talk lots about our dreams and the things we are doing to make them come true. You can also visit the "Got a dream?" page of our blog, where a link to our email will be. Feel free to send us an email, tell us your name (first name only, please), your age and your dream! we'll spotlight one person a month! There is also a lot of other stuff that will be coming soon that you can participate in!

Follow us, leave a comment or just kick back, relax and READ!

lots of love,
the girls.